Victim to Victor

Let this mind be in you, which was also in Christ Jesus. Philippians 2:5 (KJV)

I hate my life. I hate my life. I hate my life. The increasingly familiar mantra circled, a vortex of anger in my mind. Crossing my arms, I hunkered down in my seat, as far from the pulpit as I could get, and determined not to listen. Nothing he says will help me, anyway.

My normal defense is to gravitate toward the superficial in order to avoid showing my feelings, but today was my breaking point. I had been wronged. My roommates and I no longer spoke, trapped in the prison of my negativity. At some point the reason ceased mattering to me, but the anger grew, unchecked.

Volatility churned inside me until the preacher’s voice intruded. “What’s wrong with being a victim?” he asked. “Jesus was.”

Be a victim, I mused. This was a new concept, point of view being the difference. I had allowed my situation to imprison me. But so what, that I had been wronged? That I was even right?

One moment darkness engulfed me; the next, beautiful light flooded my mind and warmed my heart.

Jesus was wronged, but He did not defend Himself—not because He was God, and was right—but because He was God, and He did not have to. He had nothing to prove, only people to love.

And so did I. The realization nearly catapulted me from my seat. I loved my roommates more deeply at that moment than ever before. Love threw open my prison doors and I walked into the light—victim to victor.

Thank You, Lord, for loving us enough to become our victim, and thank You that we can have Your mind, allowing us to live victoriously.

© 2010 Katherine A. Fuller